WHY DON'T THE LITTLE CHILDREN TELL? Part 1

In my mind I go back in time to when I was a little child. I was so young, so sweet, so inexperienced, so naive and so very trusting. As little children some of us were taught to like everyone. To like strangers, to smile and grin at them, to trust officer friendly because he was going to protect us, to trust family members because they love us and to trust those in authority because they have our best interest at heart. That might have been some what true over thirty years ago BUT things have definitely changed! I have read so many sad stories about the little INNOCENT CHILDREN. These children have been belittled, bullied, raped, smacked, kicked, threatened, molested, starved, beaten, punched, choked, spit on, cut, tortured, and even killed. It tears my heart completely apart. Some have been infants, toddlers, teenagers, and young adults! Some can speak and others can't for various reason. I often wondered though, for those children that have gone through such horrific and painful times in their lives that can speak, that can talk. I often wonder. WHY DON"T THEY TELL? Many children tell these atrocities to the police, teachers, neighbors, counselors, therapist, their parents, and those in authority, which is excellent. I applaud them because this no doubt, is such a hard and scary thing to do. There is an undocumented number of children that have undergone such painful times BUT THEY WILL NOT TELL. I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHY?

I HAVE DONE SOME DIGGING, I HAVE DONE SOME READING AND I HAVE DONE SOME RESEARCH. THIS IS WHAT I HAVE FOUND! There has been estimated that 2 out of every 9 children will be abused over the next 20 years. That is over 17,000,000 of our country's children. ONLY HALF WILL EVER BE REPORTED! When abuse does occur, it is more than likely the abuse occurs at the hand of someone the child knows. It can be relatives, friends of the family, friends of friends, friends of the abused, rather than a stranger. In some cases older children abuse younger children. Children who have been abused or are being abused will often feel very confused. They may be very uncertain about what to do, what to say and who to tell. Some children may not realize, some may not even come to the conclusion that what has been happening to them is actually abuse.

TO ANSWER THE QUESTION, WHY DON'T THEY TELL? There are so many reasons why the poor innocent children decide not to tell of their abuse, many reasons are complex! (1) Being quiet may be easier especially when children may be too young to vocalize or put into words what has happened (2) The child/children may have been bribed by the abuser to keep quiet, to keep it a secret (3) They may feel confused by the attention given and by the feelings they may have accompanying the abuse (4) The child/children may feel that no one would ever believe them (5) They blame themselves for what happened or believe that they were abused, or are being abused because of something bad that they have done (6) The child/children may feel too ashamed of himself or embarrassed to even tell (7) They may be worried about getting in trouble or even getting a loved one in trouble (8) The child/children may have a fear of the abuser, fear of causing trouble, fear of losing adults that are important to them, fear of being taken away from home, fear of being labeled as different. (9) They may feel anger at the abuse, anger at other adults around them that did not protect them, anger at themselves, anger because they think that something is wrong with them, anger because they feel alone or abandoned in what they are experiencing, anger because they have trouble talking about the bad experience. (10) The child/children may feel sadness about having something taken from them, sadness about being betrayed by someone they had confidence in or trusted, or even sadness about growing up too fast. (11) They may feel guilt that they could not stop the abuse, guilt about believing that somehow they consented to the abuse (no child is able to consent), guilt about being involved in the experience, guilt about their bodies. (12) The child/children may feel a sense of confusion because they may love and/or still care about the abuser, confusion about their feelings that change all of the time.

There you have it! Valid and important reasons why the poor little, innocent children may not tell of their abuse! CHILDREN seem to be the world's punching bags in society in so any ways. CHILDREN FACE physical, emotional, sexual abuse along with neglect and abandonment. What are the signs and symptoms of abuse? What can be done? and How can we help? The answers to these questions will be revealed in my next blog post entitled WHY DON"T THE LITTLE CHILDREN TELL? Part 2! Please SUBSCRIBE, COMMENT, SHARE AND LIKE! Until next time, BE SAFE, BE KIND AND BE CAREFUL!